PSY 201 Discussion New Parent/Caregiver Advice
PSY 201 Discussion New Parent/Caregiver Advice

Based on your readings and the videos provided, what advice would you give new parents/caregivers in order to ensure healthy attachment between infant and parent/caregiver?

DQ2 Stage Theories

Like Piaget and Freud, both Erikson and Kohlberg postulate “stage theories” of development. Do you believe that stage theories accurately reflect the timing and sequence of developmental events? Use examples from the theories of Erikson and Kohlberg to support your answer.

DQ3 Heinz Dilemma

This unit discusses Kohlberg’s Theory of Moral Development. The “Heinz Dilemma” scenario helps classify an individual’s stage of moral development. How would you respond if faced with this dilemma?

1. Friends Offering Help: A lot of people are going to be offering you help at first. In the moment you might not be able to think of anything they can help with, or you might not want to bother them. These people are your friends and they would not be offering help if they did not want to help. Remember, people like and want to be helpful! If you can’t think of anything they can help with, food is always a good option. Not worrying about making dinner is such a relief. Friends are you reading this? Gas giftcards are a good option if you are feeling like you want to help but don’t know how.

2. Taking Care of Yourself: The food topic leads me to No. 2. Remember to eat and take care of yourself! Don’t skip your own meals. Stick fruit and granola bars in your bag or in your car. Sleep. Sleep whenever you can for as long as you can. Breathe deeply. Cry if you need to cry. It’s OK to let yourself feel your feelings. This is hard! I once learned that feelings are neither good nor bad, they just are. So just let yourself feel them, get it out. Talk to your friends. Share your story. Blog, write, draw, read. You still need to be your No. 1. You won’t be able to thrive as a caregiver if you yourself are not well.

3. Resources: Explore your resources! Go online, Google everything in your area. Explore the wealth of information throughout this Caregiving MetroWest site. Call your local Aging Services Access Point, your local Senior Center, your local Day Programs. There is so much out there to help you. People working at these agencies want to help you find a successful plan. Don’t be afraid to call or make inquiries. You wouldn’t believe the amount of help available to you.

4. Social Media: Facebook, Twitter, Instagram- these might be the last things on your mind at this time, but just a couple words of advice: Be mindful of what you are posting about your situation. Absolutely create posts asking for recommendations for Nursing Homes or Hospitals. Ask for opinions on Acute Rehab versus regular Rehab. Just don’t post a play-by-play of your daily routine. You don’t want the world to know when you are not home, or that a house is going to be empty for a few weeks. Don’t accidentally make your home a target to anyone who may have ill intentions.

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PSY 201 Discussion New Parent/Caregiver Advice
PSY 201 Discussion New Parent/Caregiver Advice

5. Work: If you have taken on the huge responsibility of becoming a caregiver I am willing to bet you are also a dedicated, hard-working employee. Talk to your boss. Talk to H.R. You are a good employee. They value you. They want to keep you on their team. Ask about Sick Time usage. Ask for information on the Family Medical Leave Act. These things were created to help us, don’t be afraid to utilize them. Even just having the information in the back of your mind will help put some of your fears to rest.

6. Voice Your Concerns: Don’t be afraid to be the “Squeaky Wheel.” Now I’m not suggesting you bombard the hospital/rehab/nursing home with phone calls, but if you have concerns, speak up! I’ve learned that these types of facilities change staff often, usually 7 a.m.-3 p.m., 3 p.m.-11 p.m. and overnight 11 p.m.-7 a.m. shifts. That is a lot of staff coming in contact with your mom or dad. Sometimes things happen and not all information gets passed on. We’re all human. Mistakes can happen. Things sometimes go unnoticed. Don’t bottle up your concerns. Speak up as soon as you have them. Check in often with the staff. Make your presence known at the facility.

7. Share responsibility/Set Boundaries: You cannot do everything for everyone all of the time. Take a step back and define your role. Where are you going to draw the line? It is NOT selfish for you to want to have your own life while being a caregiver. Find someone you trust to help share tasks and enlist their help. Use this HIPAA form so someone you trust can also call and check-in with the facility or get information on behalf of your loved one.

8. Give Yourself a Break: Honestly, cut yourself some slack. If something goes wrong, don’t beat yourself up over it. There is no roadmap for caregiving. There is no step by step guide outlining the “right way” to do this. You’ll learn what works as you go along. No one plans to parent their parents when you hardly feel like an adult yourself. It’s OK to make mistakes. Talk to other caregivers, find comfort and support in each other.